Conrad's horror is my irony; so near and yet so far.

I looked so hard for it (must have been 2 hours now) and it was within reach all the while. Maybe it's a sign I should give it up.

Because finding it made me realise how inadequate my desire was, how my and not His, how it is not the best thing.

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I knew I'd forgotten someone on the hit list: Murphy's Law.
It was Mr Hil after all. Luckily he's forgiving (must curry favour a bit, 'paw' him so as to avoid wrath). missing for weeks while his design was paraded by an hundred youths. if found, please contact fashion police.

And then there were two: Ben Long's pinch is atrocious! he'd better not find out I forgot his name too.

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Was never true love loved in vain,
For truest love is highest gain.
No art can make it: it must spring
Where elements are fostering.
~George Eliot